Saturday, July 31, 2010

Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

That was what Shakespeare said. Which I only came to know after watching another rerun episode of Criminal Minds. Spencer Reid I LOVE YOU. Haha.

On the way home in the car with my parents, while listening to them talk about the most random-est (ade ke perkataan macam tu?) of things, tiba-tiba I dapat an epiphany.

I can't afford to screw it. Not to them. Not after all the things they've done for me.

I will not screw my studies.
I will not screw my work.
I will not screw myself. (this meaning, from now on I'm going to do all the things that make me happy, not anyone else).

Of course right now, the 2 things that absolutely give me utter bliss are my studies and my work.

For the first time in such a long, long time, I feel like I've everything under control in my life.

The only thing left to do is to rid myself from all those petty distractions yang currently bukan first priority in my life.

At the same time nak betulkan balik karma la.

I say "Be kind to your mother, be kind to your father, be kind to your sister, be kind to your brother before being kind to anybody else."

Friday, July 09, 2010

Cloudy, with 50% chance of rain...

50-50 was what I kept repeating to myself.

Though tak terlalu berharap la kan...

Even convinced thy self that it has to be avoided at all cost.

But of course life usually has other plans for you. (Haha, melodramatic much?)

Bila kita tak berharap sangat dia jadi la. Vice versa.

I should thank you, God, for today.

With a smile like that, one could really forget why one was there in the first place.

Saturday, July 03, 2010

"You broke my Birkin!!"

New handbags have a way of making a girl feel like she's in love. She would feel happy, content and for a week or so nothing can rain on her parade.

For those who are close to me, they would know that I'm passionately in love with bags. I can make do without shoes, just not bags. And although one of my 2010 resolutions is to not buy more handbags (mind you, it is darn hard to refrain myself from buying a new bag each month especially when I do actually have the $$-$$ to splurge this year with the part-time job and all) I found myself succumbing to my weak self this week.

Black studded handbag and a red patent purse, both by Charles and Keith.

And as I was passing by Dorothy Perkins, another bag caught my attention. A quilted, cream coloured, Chanel inspired bag. Okay, so I already have one in black that I got last year but there's no harm in getting one in a different colour. Kan?? Besides, the design is totally different from the one in black.

The day before yesterday, when Amal and I were hanging out in The Gardens Mall, we found out that Coach was doing a clearance sale. 50% off for all handbags. Yes, the big five oh. No joke

Because I'm a student who still lives with her parents, RM1000++ bags are usually out of the question. But 50% off somehow made the impossible seemed possible.

Amal was hyperventilating (I think) as she called her mom and let her know about the sale. She was targeting a pink cute tote bag.

Did I mentioned the bags on sale are all from the Poppy line? When the Poppy collection first came out I could only dream of getting one of the bags someday. I even tore out the ad from one of the magazines.

Unfortunately, the one I've been lusting for, the one I desperately wanted (next to the Gucci Indy bag) was sold out.

No 2 on my bag wish-list

As for Amal, I'm not sure whether she managed to convince her mom to get her the bag or not since she said she'll come back later in the evening with her mom.

Sometimes I wonder to myself, "If only a guy could make me feel this way."

Utter bliss weh... Even Johnny Depp comes second to bags.

Sharing the wisdom of Blair Waldorf, "Whoever said money doesn't buy happiness obviously didn't know where to shop."

As for me, I find happiness in handbag shops.

Thursday, July 01, 2010

Move along, move along just to make it through...

I love routines. They help keep me stable. Routines also help me into thinking I've everything under control. And when you have OCPD, control is crucial or chances are, you're going to find yourself suffering from a nervous breakdown.

The thing with people who love routines is they always have a hard time moving on when something has come to an end. And they are always, most of the time, terrified of new beginnings, because it means having to face the fact that things are changing.

I suck at moving on, at saying goodbyes... Sometimes, I simply skip the goodbye part altogether. It's rude to some but I don't think they know just how hard it is for me.

I definitely suck at letting go of the past. Especially when the past is too good a memory to just easily let go of.

I would cling on to it for dear life, if I had it my way.

If I can't, then you could most probably find me in my 3rd house, Denial Land.

New beginnings are supposed to be fun, I know. Don't think I don't.

But I'm just plain scared. That's all.